Friday, July 27, 2012


On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

And God saw that it was good.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.."

The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"

And God, again, saw that it was good.

On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed it was good.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back? Then, I could live until I was around eighty... would that be okay?

"Okay," said God. "You asked for it."

So... that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey-like tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and 'bark' at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me, I will be out on the front porch.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Very important facts

Here is a list of things that nobody should go through another day without knowing.  I don't know how I survived yesterday without these facts!

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Dog's life

Bella in her favorite place during the heat.

God Bless --johnnyb

The Old Doberman

 An old Doberman starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers 
that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly 
in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old Doberman thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep shit now!"

Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down 
to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the 
panther is about to leap, the old Doberman exclaims loudly,

"Boy, that was one delicious panther! I wonder, if there are any more 
around here?"

Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look 
of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.

"Whew!," says the panther, "That was close! That old Doberman nearly 
had me!"

Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a 
nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it 
for protection from the panther. So, off he goes.

The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and 
strikes a deal for himself with the panther.

The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, 
squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that 
conniving canine!"

Now, the old Doberman sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his 
back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, 
the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't 
seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old 
Dobermann says .......

"Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another 
Moral of this story...

Don't mess with the old dogs... Age and skill will always overcome 
youth and treachery!
Bull Shit and brilliance only come with age and experience.
God bless--johnnyb 

Monday, July 16, 2012

Summer for sure

   To my very good friend LaVern over in Iowa, I'm back.  Just like as bad penny, always returning.  LaVern doesn't have a blog, but his wonderful wife Carolyn does.  Give it a look.  We have been friends  and have swapped ideas for years.  I think I used a lot more of his.  Anyway, LaVern ,  I'll try to keep going on this more again.

The weather has been hot and dry forever it seems.  We have been able to keep the garden going pretty good.  We canned green beans last week and have more picked and snapped and ready to can in the morning.  We put up sweet corn today.  Didn't have as much as we had hoped for.  The birds were eating it before it was ready.  We will finish it later this week.  The heat hit the tomatoes at the wrong time.  Have good plants, but they have not set on much.  The heat was about a month earlier than usual.  June is usually hot, but not days of 110-115 degrees.  I keep hoping that they will still produce.

The area near us that burned a few weeks ago has been blowing dirt lately.  The dirt is just like sugar sand.  there are times when it is almost a brown-out. 

Finished the outdoor enclosure for the quail and turned them out today.  They have enjoyed it immensely.

They like the scraps from canning. They are fun to watch.  It is amazing how much they can grow in just 4 weeks time.

I want to welcome Rocky Oak Homestead.  Thanks for stopping by.  I always try to answer all comments.  This time of year it might be a day or two.

God Bless All--johnnyb

Wednesday, July 4, 2012


Happy 4th of July to all.  It will be a quiet one in this area.  A lot of the counties and cities have banned sales and shooting of fireworks for this year because of the dry conditions.  There has been quite a few fires in the past two weeks.  the one that was near our place burned 6-7000 acres.  No houses were lost, but a lot of other buildings were.  We have a a few storms blow through that produced a lot of lightning and very little rain.
We have been able to keep the garden going ok.  We canned beets on Monday. 
Here is Carol and Bella washing the beets.  Bella enjoys doing anything that involves water.  We didn't have a lot, but they will be a good addition to the pantry.  We have a wood stove set up outside, so we didn't have to heat up the house.  We did the water bath inside, but cooked them outside.

The quail ventured outside for the first time yesterday.  They liked it.  Matter of fact they liked it so well they didn't want to go in.  I had to put them in one at a time by hand.  They were two weeks old yesterday.

Not much else been going on lately.  Just trying to stay cool.  Hope everyone is doing ok.
God Bless this Great Country--johnnyb